Sunday, November 29, 2009

The Luau Burger

Mookalakakiki come on ya wanna lay me, pass the poi mahalo... and try a Luau Burger.

This is the fourth burger in our journey (longer posts about the Taco and Italian Burgers still to come) and quite frankly is our most adventurous and our dedication to Hawaii.

Hawaii is either our 49th or 50th state and very few people have ever been there, certainly none of the Sexy Burger crew. There is a lot of mystery surrounding their culture and their food, which really made this burger a challenge.

Sure we had heard the stereotypes that most of them are of Asian descent and they are all friendly. But what did our mysterious brothers and sisters to the east eat on a daily basis?

After months and months of research we determined that their chief staples were: pork, teriyaki, pineapple, maraschino cherries, and SPAM. Because SPAM is most likely gross, we decided to incorporate the other four ingredients, add some smoked cheddar cheese on top and serve the burgers on a classic toasted burger bun.

  • Ground pork: We chose pork over beef to pay tribute to the classic Luau pig roast. Since we had never worked with ground pork we were unsure of what type of flavor we would get. To control the flavor ourselves we added teriyaki, salt, and pepper to the ground pork. This resulted in very juicy and flavorful patties, although next time we would add more teriyaki because we did not account for how much the sauce cooks off.
  • Teriyaki: Again, added above in the ground pork, also added on top of the pork while cooking and used after as a condiment. This is the tribute to the Asian influence in Hawaii.
  • Pineapples and maraschino cherries: Because Hawaii is an island they probably have pineapples by the bushulful and the cherries (they must be maraschino for coloring and flavor) serve as perfect companions. We cooked the fruits in a frypan adding teriyaki to the mix until the fruit was slightly browned and candied. This was our largest risk taken as there was some skepticism that a sweet burger would not work. The skepticism was dead wrong. This shit was delicious.
  • Smoked cheddar cheese: This gave a nice smokiness to the burger that also called to mind a pig roast.
We served our burgers with a side of tater tots (not necessarily traditional Hawaiian fare but I'm sure they love these over there) and a delicious pineapple rum drink complete with mini-umbrella.

The experiment paid off better than expected placing the Luau Burger on the level with any burger we have tried before. The success of the Luau Burger has broken down the doors to us greatly expanding our ideas of where the burger can go. Stay tuned to one such barrier buster next week. Aloha.

The Luau Burger in Pictures

The Thanksgiving Burger

Thanksgiving is the longest standing American tradition (it's a Canadian one as well, but that is the first and hopefully last time we will ever mention Canada again on this site, until America inevitable invades it and claims it as our own).

On the fourth Thursday of every November, American families and friends gather for the feast of all feasts. Each unit has varying traditions (although those that do not serve turkey do not count as celebrating Thanksgiving), but all include several central themes that make this holiday so great.

1) Family and friends: Whether you are the 93 year old grandmother who the children are too afraid to give a hug to, the rebellious daughter who alternates between boyfriends named Lizard and girlfriends named Destiny just for the controversy, the drunk uncle who always ends up shirtless and crying, or Dad's old army buddy who lets the racial slurs fly much too easily, Thanksgiving is a time for acceptance of all.

2) Drinking: Of course to accept all, most of us need a little help. Luckily, Thanksgiving is a holiday where drinking starts early and runs right through the day. In my family, the Bloody Mary's and Mimosas generally start the day around 11 while Mom slaves away in the kitchen. Then at noon, we take our annual whiskey/tequila shot with a conference call to those who couldn't make it. Once the guests arrive the Windjammers come out (recipe available upon request). At this point it becomes guests choice. When dinner is served around 4, bottles upon bottles of red wine become the drinks of choice. Finally, after dinner and for the remainder of the night, it is whatever anyone can get their hands on. One cannot be too picky at 11 PM on Thanksgiving.

3) Football: Thanksgiving is American. Football is American. Thanksgiving is Football.

4) Food: The star of the show. No holiday is more synonymous with food. As I said before, it all starts with the turkey. If you don't serve turkey you can giiiit out. The sides and desserts are where families are allowed to tweak, but typically include mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce, yams/sweetpotatoes/squash, green beans, cornbread, stuffing, apple/pumpkin pie.

Now, if you are still with me after my Thanksgiving primer, I will finally get to my point. The Thanksgiving Burger.

The components of Thanksgiving dinner are fantastic, but let's be honest take a lot of prep time, making it difficult to get the full flavor more than once or twice a year leaving most of us with a Thanksgiving hole.

Well have no fear friends because the Thanksgiving Burger is here to plug that hole. Combining turkey, gravy, mashed potatoes, stuffing, cornbread and cranberry sauce, this delicious burger combines the best elements of Thanksgiving in one (not so) tidy package.

  • Cornbread buns: This is an idea that looked better on paper than in operation. We were only able to pick up the burger for one bite before it fell apart, but then it became open faced, which is just fiiiiiine with us.
  • Turkey burger patty: Ground turkey can be very bland on its own and usually you need to infuse it with a lot of seasoning. Well, instead of using seasoning we used Thanksgiving's natural seasoning: stuffing. Using store bought stuffing to save time and money, we cooked the stuffing, let it cool, and then mixed it with the ground turkey. This provided the meat with the flavor shot it needed and turned out excellent.
  • Mashed potatoes: Made by the beautiful Ms. Hendricks (I'm required by law to give at least one compliment to my girlfriend per post), we elected to go with the homemade variety because you truly cannot beat this method.
  • Cranberry sauce: As a group, our personal choice was the canned jelly style cranberry sauce because the shape and consistency seemed to fit best with this burger. If you choose to go with chutney or some other recipe, well good on ya.
  • Gravy: Finally, my favorite piece of the puzzle. Gravy actually belongs on the bottom of my food pyramid. I would eat it as a meal if it were more socially acceptable. Anyway, this becomes a necessity because with the ground turkey/stuffing, potatoes, and cornbread, this burger could be very dry without this condiment of the gods.
So there you have it. The Thanksgiving Burger. The holiday most associated with food, now has its own burger. We hope you enjoy it as much as we did, and when you give your thanks around the table before eating it, make sure to thank the Sexy Burger crew.

Mafiosa Special

  • Garlic Bread Bun
  • Il Signor Bergeron's Full-Flavored Meatball Burgers
  • Zesty Homemade Red Sauce
  • Deliciously Stinky Sliced Parmesan Cheese
  • Two Steaming Hot, 100% Authentic Italian Raviolis

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

When I was a child I would dream of being a bird and flying high above the Earth and relishing in all her I dream of being a snake so that I can unhinge my jaw and eat massive burgers!

Monday, November 23, 2009

The Thanksgiving Day Burger in Utero with all the fixings, sans cranberry sauce...mash potatoes, stuffing, and gravy. Please note the stuffing infused burger fetus

Friday, November 20, 2009

A Warm Welcome to Sexy Burger

There once was a man who set out to make the perfect burger.

I am not that man.

I, along with my girlfriend and friends, have set out to create literally dozens of the most creative and delicious burgers that this world has ever known. In fact, you may even say that this is the most important mission the world has ever known.

So we invite you all to come along with us on this journey of burger magic. This will be the place where we share pictures, stories, and ingredients. We are open to suggestions on names, ingredients, and beer combos, so feel free to share.

The ultimate goal of this burger orgy and adjoining blog is someday getting out of all our dead end jobs and starting the finest burger joint in the country.

We will be posting at least one burger per week, starting with the Taco Burger, followed by the Spaghetti and Meatball Burger and the Thanksgiving Burger.

So put on some stretchy pants, grab a beer or 10, get a roll of TP ready, and enjoy the Sexy Burger odyssey.